If you had told me 10 years ago that the very day of my 10 year wedding anniversary, I’d be flying to my house in Aruba…
…with my husband and four year old child…
…and that I’d not only know how to cook, but that I’d be a food blogger, be a contributor on a chef’s website, along with being a yoga teacher, and among many other job titles and roles, that I’d be a mother…
…I would have laughed in your face.
And asked you to pour me another Kettle One on the rocks, extra cherries. I was on a double-fisting liquid diet combined with maraschino cherries for many years. And oh God, it sure was fun but I grew up and those days are long gone.
But no, really, I can’t believe it’s the day of my 10 year wedding anniversary.
In this post, I wrote about how we met, how we moved in together almost immediately, and then moved across the country together without knowing a soul.
I also talked about our $199 Las Vegas impromtu wedding, my hot pink Betsey Johnson “wedding” dress, my pink plastic gum-machine ring, and my plastic bouquet.
I gave some of my thoughts about what makes a marriage work and traits that can help make marriage work. Here’s a cut and paste of those:
“I am not an expert, but after 9 years married and 10+ together, things that I think help make long term partnerships work are as follows. There are no guarantees, and this is not a complete list, but these things help give a union a better chance of survival:
A Sense of Humor
Open Communication
Not Lying/Being Truthful
Admitting when I’m Wrong
Saying I’m Sorry
Sacrifice
Rolling with Changes and accepting that People Change, Life Changes, Situations Change
Having Fun
Being each other’s Best Friend
Laughter
Listening
Showing Support for his Interests
Giving Space & Freedom to Pursue things that have nothing to do with Me or the Relationship
Showing Empathy
Showing Tough Love when needed
Respect
Admiration
Acceptance that no one is perfect
Tolerance for things that annoy me but I practice accepting them anyway
Patience
A little bit of luck that the person I married is sane and normal which helps a lot
Letting the little stuff slide as much as possible
Gratitude for our marriage and for Scott being in my life and being my life partner”
Go read the original post if you have a minute because it’s quite entertaining.
The past 10 years have had ups, downs, and sideways moments. Marriage is hard work, it’s not always easy, it’s not always fun. I will not say we are one of those couples who “never argues”. Oh, we have and we do.
But we’ve also had our share of fabulous moments. We have truly lived. We did everything together before Skylar was born; we were joined at the hip when one of us wasn’t traveling for work.
In our free time, we traveled together from Napa Valley…
to St. John and underwater snorkeling trails.
We saw beautiful places and explored together. We lived on a canyon with hot air balloons that flew overhead and sipped wine on our patio while we watched them go by.
We worked out together from yoga classes to running 5 and 10k’s to running half marathons together.
We got Scuba dive certified together.
We had dinners out, drinks out, parties out, and more going out moments than you can imagine.
Poseidon in Del Mar was a weekly fave for drinks and apps on the patio.
It’s been a wild ride, full of adventure and passion, and we both like to live life to the fullest!
We don’t spend nearly the amount of time together that we used to. A child, our jobs, life in general is just different, but Scott knows me better than anyone, he’s my best friend, and vice versa.
He has no idea it’s our anniversary. I gave up getting bent out of shape that he forgets birthdays and anniversaries years ago and we don’t exchange gifts anyway. I know he loves me, even if he forgets certain dates. Truly, I don’t even care anymore!
Here’s to another decade, with happy times and more memories to be made. Hopefully starting when we land in Aruba!
Happy Anniversary, Scott! (For his job reasons, I don’t post pictures of him on my blog and unfortunately, I never used to take a fraction of the pictures that I do now, so I don’t have many snapshots of life 5-10 years ago, and what I do have, is not digital.)
From my last post about Contributing & Superstitious, thanks for the kind words on my new gig. Yes, I’m excited! And Holly told me that Marcus won Top Chef Masters and he cooked for President Obama. Wow!
I hope that Friday the 13th went just dandy for those of you who are superstitious, too.
Questions:
1. Have you ever been married? Or what’s the longest relationship you’ve been in?
I cannot believe I’ve been with Scott for a third of my life! I was young when I got married, and everyone said it wouldn’t last.
That he was too old for me (he’s 17 years older than I am) and that he was going through a midlife crisis and I was looking for a father figure.
That we didn’t know each other well enough to have gotten married so soon and that it was just “a phase”.
Well, I guess we proved them all wrong because it did last.
2. What are your top relationship tips? What advice or tips have worked for you?
Basically just realizing that sh*t happens, and not getting too bent out of shape about it, being able to forgive and forget, and just knowing he has my back and is not trying to piss me off in those stressful moments, those are things I remember when the going gets tough.
You read some my other tips in the body of the post.
Any you want to share?
3. What are your favorite relationship memories? When you think about your current (or past) relationships, what do you remember fondly?
The biggest things that I miss, and remember extremely fondly, is just having unstructured time together and goofing off.
Going out without having to “plan” for it, going out drinking, sitting around on the couch watching episodes of the Bachelor and American Idol together, working out every day together, I miss those things, tremendously. But hey, I have the memories and this phase of life isn’t forever and we will get back to some of those things, too.
Happy Decade, Scott!
(I will make sure he reads this post since he rarely reads my blog)
{ 100 comments… read them below or add one }
Congratulation to you and Scott! Im sure you make a beautiful couple, and i would love to see a photo of him. but of course, I do understand that you cant post it!!
Wish you a happy day with your family!
Congratulations Averie, Enjoy your time.. n yeh do make Scott read this, am sure he will be proud of u..
Wish you keep on enjoying many more wonderful decades 2gether…
i gave him a card in the SAN airport and i am in ATL airport checking my comments and i will make him read this post for sure
i Hope he doesnt get angry coz of ur blogging :p
Awww how sweet! Happy anniversary!! And what a way to spend it, in Aruba! Hope the three of you have fun, and may you and Scott have many more anniversaries to celebrate
AWWWWW! I LOVE THIS POST! You deserve all the happiness in the world, Averie. You are such an amazing woman. And you crack me up, I love reading about your ‘liquid diet’! Congratulations to you and your hubby, and your wonderful family.
I’ve been with Cody for 6.5 years, which seems so short because we both agree we can’t even imagine life without the other. He is without a doubt the best thing that has ever happened to me. Finding him was pure luck, but staying together, is, as you say, hard work. People sometimes assume that if you find the right person it’s smooth sailing from there, but that’s not true. Combining lives with another human being is really complicated and stressful at times, and you have to learn to compromise, by PATIENT, and forgive, and not sweat the small stuff. It is without a doubt the most amazing thing either of us has ever done. He is my best friend, the funniest person I know, and (this is what really made me fall for him) the kindest, most gentle, most understanding, sweetest person I’ve ever met. OKAY! Enough mushy stuff!
Enjoy your vacation and have fun celebrating!
“People sometimes assume that if you find the right person it’s smooth sailing from there, but that’s not true.” –amen sista! glad you and cody have the magic!
Wow, Averie, what an incredible post. I’m delurking to tell you how beautifully written this was, and how lucky you are to have such an incredible relationship. To many decades more!
thanks for delurking!
Congratulations on ten happy years! hope you enjoy your holiday!
Happy anniversary!
Rob and I just celebrated #26 a couple of weeks ago, and we lived together a year before that. That’s half of our lives!
(This is a brief cruise through the internet before my 3am bus ride to SFO. Good-bye for the next 10 days!)
have fun in S.D. we had AWFUL timing on that one! im in the ATL airport right now…as you were leaving SFO.
Congratulations! What a beautiful, profound post … I love your tips and I think you’ve got it just right; my parents have one of the worst relationships I’ve seen (short of violence – my dad’s emotionally and psychologically abusive, which people seem to take less seriously), largely because it consists of the opposite of all those traits. Growing up with that as my model, I had a hard time believing that any two people could be happy together (and if they said they were it was just a front), so I love reading these kind of posts on blogs: thank you, and have a fantastic time!
Congratulations to you and Scott! I love the post about your Las Vegas wedding, I was cracking up the whole time! It looks like you two have had a wonderful 10+ years together.
Great post!
This was a lovely read. Congratulations on 10 years! I sat here nodding my head in agreement with your list of things that make a marriage work. Brent and I have been married for 21 years (we were 19 and 20 when we tied the knot) and we heard the same things you did. Everyone thought we were too young, people gave us 6 months, and whether or not I was knocked up was whispered about by more than a few people. We ignored it all, got married, and moved 900 miles away. Twenty plus years later? Marrying him was the best decision I have ever made, and he’s still the best friend I’ve ever had.
My advice for when things get contentious? Breathe in, breathe out, move on.
congrats on 2 decades!
I love this post – and the ones you linked to. I had to read about how you met! And it was a lovely story that put a smile and giggle on my face
Congratulations on the 10 years!
“Rolling with Changes and accepting that People Change, Life Changes, Situations Change” love that bit. So true; I mean, is it possible to not change over the course of ten years? Even if it’s mostly the surface; deep down we’re (usually) still the same person
happy, happy anniversary, scott and averie!
wow, i love your story and all that you have accomplished together over the years.
amazing travel experiences is a definite personal highlight – you can always bookmark a certain era by remembering The Moab Trip, or in your case The Snorkeling Trip etc.
Love how you guys have defied the odds.
Averie, a betsey johnson wedding dress would be my dream come true!!
hope you’ve safely landed in aruba!!
and it was hot pink with purple trim
totally betsy, totally me 
Happy Anniversary! I hope you have a wonderful time in Aruba.
At thirty, I’ve been engaged twice, but never married. I really had never been single until about 2 years ago! I’m loving it right now, but there are times I miss that friendship…that bond. I’m learning how to love myself, so that I can share that love down the road.
What an adventurous couple you two are! Hope you have many more decades of happy memories.
Averie, I absolutely LOVE this. Happy anniversary, my dear friend! xoxo
Uh oh, the link to your original post (about how you and Scott met) doesn’t work
fixed
thx for lmk! sitting in the atl airport fixing my links…lol
i had linked it twice, first place worked, 2nd didnt
all better now
Congrats on 10years and a beautiful, happy child
It’s almost 6 months of married life for me, but we’ve been together for 4.5 years, and I still can’t put into words how I feel when I’m wrapped in his arms. Love is so intense & amazing that silence begins to speak. My wish for everyone is that they fight the urge to settle, because earth-shattering love exists.
Happy 10 year Anny to you and Scott! How beautiful!!! I hope you pop a bottle of your favorite champagne while in Aruba!!!!
I have been with Mike for 3 years, well 3 years next Saturday! We will be married June 18th! I am very blessed to have such a great man, we both have love, respect, trust, and always listen to each other, Mike and I have had our ups and downs, like every relationship, but we communicate and come back stronger, her really is my best friend and the best man, I am very lucky : )
Have fun in Aruba! Love u!!
and you’re getting married super close to my bday…and i know you guys are perfect!!! for each other xoxo
Congratulations! I celebrated my 10th last year (and we were together for over 8 years before we got married). Having your best friend share your life is nothing short of amazing.
Enjoy your hard-earned trip!
you are truly blessed and you are WONDERFUL!! happy anniversary!
Hi Averie!
Congratumalations on a decade! We’ve just celebrated our half decade with a big trip to Australia!
Sorry I’ve been a bad commenter recently – still reading!
Lots of love xx
Happy Anniversary! Have a fabulous time! I’m not married yet but will be in July! We have been together for six years! I hope the next ten years is as action packed for me as it has been for you!
congratulations and happy anniversary! have an amazing time together!
awwwwwww
10 years! That is just so fabulous. And I agree with all your thoughts and advice! I think honesty and open communication are SO important! Hope you guys are having a ball in Aruba 
Josh and I will be married 4 years in August and we dated about 3 1/2 before getting married. I just knew, it really just clicked. Love him to pieces!
This is SUCH a beautiful post Averie!!! I believe that there is someone perfect out there for everyone, but just because someone is “perfect” doesn’t mean that a relationship or marriage doesn’t take a lot of effort to keep it strong. A relationship teaches you that sometimes you have to sacrifice a little (in disagreements and whatnot) in order to get a lot (a happy relationship). But it always has to go both ways. Congrats to you and Scott on your 10th Anniversary!
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Happy Anniversary! It sounds amazing. I’ve been married almost 14 years and while marriage is hard work sometimes (who are we kidding if we say it’s a dream fantasy 24/7?), I find it to be extremely rewarding in every way and totally worth any downs there are.
My main advice-don’t expect your husband to read your mind about what your emotional needs are and then get mad at him when he doesn’t meet them. He’s not a superhuman. Meet him half-way
Congratulations!!! I love this tip: “A little bit of luck that the person I married is sane and normal” haha! Today is actually mine and my boyfriend’s anniversary… 26 months! Not quite ten years but we’re getting there
Awww congratulations and happy anniversary, Averie! I especially loved “Admitting when I’m Wrong” I have such a hard time with this… but, you’re right on each and every single point.
Hey! Love your website! I am thinking of taking my hubbie to Aruba in August, can you tell me some nice places to stay? Thanks!
Happy Anniversary girl! I hope you guys get to spend some really solid time together on the beach drinking cocktails! I still hope to see those wedding pictures someday… I truly feel so lucky to have found Colin, someone who is more of a partner in crime than just a boyfriend. The lazy time we spend together walking around the city is probably my favorite. Safe travels!
LOVE THIS!! Adorable girl <3 Happy anniversary!!
Happy Anniversary and I hope you all have a wonderful time! I just read your how me met and it is such a beautiful story. Congrats on making it work!
Happy 10 years!! That’s awesome- I love hearing about love, especially since today’s world seems so pessimistic about it. My longest relationship is the one I’m in with Mike. It will be 3 years in June! (unofficially…the “real” date is in september). I think that trust is the biggest thing. If you can’t trust the person you love, then I really don’t think that you can count on being happy in the long run. I also think humor is important. If you can’t laugh at yourselves and each other, things get boring really fast!
Happy happy anniversary my friend! What a wonderful way to spend it: in a beautiful location, with your beautiful daughter.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!
I don’t comment very often, but I do read daily…I have to say this is a fantastic post! I have been with my husband for 8 years and everything you listed is exactly what our relationship is all about. We are connected at the hip most of the time but also know when one of us needs the time apart to grow.
I hope you, Scott and Skylar have a fabulous time in Aruba!
What a beautiful post Averie, it made me smile. Wishing you and Scott a very happy anniversary and wishing you all a fun holiday in Aruba. I like all your relationship tips on what makes a good relationship. I agree with them and I think I’ve learnt a lot from all my previous relationships, some more serious than others. I think for me some of the keys to a great relationship include having lots of fun, them being your best friend, giving each other freedom to be, honesty, laughter, loyalty, acceptance, forgiveness and accepting a person for who they are and seeing the beauty of that person faults and all. I learnt about myself from all past relationships and I think each guy taught me something (even if I only met them on one date), there was definitely something for me to learn from them if that makes sense. I have a new man on the scene so it’s an exciting time.
Enjoy the day and the sunshine in Aruba, have plenty of cocktails on the beach for me. Have a wonderful holiday and heres to another 10 years and more with Scott.
Congratulations Averie! I was just talking the other day about how much can change in such a short amount of time. That’s the beauty of life and it is constantly amazing me as I get older! It just goes to show you that even when things are great, they can get better, and what seemed unfathomable at one point is reality eventually!
Have an amazing time in Aruba with your gorgeous family!
congratulations on 10 adventure-filled years and may you have many, many more together!
tony and i have been together 10 years, married for 8 (9 next month). i agree with SO much of what you said, about honesty, accepting that people change, remembering that they have your back even when things are stressful. for me one of the biggest realizations was that i still need to pursue my own interests and spend time doing my own thing, and so does he.
hope you have an awesome time in aruba!
What a beautiful post! I always laugh when people ask what I think I’ll be doing, or what I want to be doing 10 years from now. I can’t even predict what I’ll be up to a year away! If you would a told me I’d be living in Austin a year ago, I would have laughed, or AZ before that, or Baltimore before that. I love that about life!
Happy Anniversary!
I have been married for almost five years, with him for almost nine. Communication, loyalty and trust are key. We know we can rely on one another for anything. We talk everything out, never letting anything fester to become a bigger issue.
congratulations, and what an amazing way to celebrate! You totally deserve this relaxing vacation. This post was great and I can’t believe that picture of those hot air balloons, you lived right there?!? Where was that? You have such a full and adventurous life, its truly inspiring!
Happy anniversary!
My husband and I will be celebrating our fifth wedding anniversary this summer(over 8 years together though). For me, it comes down to commitment to that person no matter what. We went through some very difficult times before we were married and we actually broke off our engagement, went our separate ways and came back together again.
That separation taught me to appreciate what my hubby has. Sure, there might be some other guy who has bigger arms or maybe doesn’t like video games so much, but I bet he can’t fix cars like my hubby can, or won’t carry my purse when I’m shopping(or get down on his knees to take off the shoe I’m wearing and slip a new shoe on to my foot). This hypothetical guy will probably still fart, burp and do all those other annoying things my guy already does, but he won’t be my hubby.
We just enjoy spending time together and make sure we always make time for each other and do things for the other person. And laughter….this is a HUGE thing. We have little inside jokes and similar sense of humor about most things and sometimes we get so tickled over something, we are both nearly crying with laughter.
Our commitment to each other helped our marriage not only survive things that historically can cause breakups(medical school, a military separation, 6 months apart while I was doing externships) but we have actually thrived through these challenges.
I agree with all the things you listed as components of a successful marriage.
Congratulations on your anniversary!!
Awww, happy happy HAPPY anniversary Averie + Scott!!
Here’s to many more!
I agree with your list 100%!! There’s not much more I would add to it. When you are married to your best friend (I am!), things like presents and holidays and dates really don’t mean much because you ALWAYS enjoy each other’s company and never need a specific date to celebrate it or dedicate to it. Yeah, celebrations and holidays are fun, but over time the significance of certain days matters less and less because you find that you are perpetually living it.
We had a quick and simple exchange of vows, too. We eloped at city hall in Manhattan, then had hot dogs after the 3-minute long ceremoney. Would not have changed a thing! Maybe some day we’ll have a big bash, but either way I am more than content with what we did do and love that memory.
So with you on not taking nearly as many pics years ago as I take today! Wish I did, but who thought of it? Too busy enjoying the moment to make it blog-worthy, hahaha.
Aw happy anniversary! Your take on things is such a healthy one and I completely agree. There is so much to be said for openness, honesty and forgiveness and getting over it. The hubby and I have one been married 3.5 years and been together for 5.5. We got married really young too and I’m sure people were saying plenty behind our backs. We see people that are our own age and that got married separating already and it’s so sad. I absolutely miss the unstructured time. Being able to just go and not pack a diaper bag or plan with family or anything like that. It was awesome
Scuba diving looks like such fun! Unfortunately I can’t scuba dive because my lungs aren’t able to handle it since being through chemotherapy. I’ll just live vicariously through your photos!
Yay for 10 years! Definitely some great words of wisdom. Sometimes people ask me the secret (after 21 years). I think you said it better than I did! Have fun in Aruba and keep enjoying life!
Happy Anniversary!!
My husband rarely reads my blog either and then it’s only if I say, “honey, come read this.” Just like you don’t put photos up of your husband, I don’t use my husband’s first name. I’ve asked him a couple times if I could use it and he’s adamant that he doesn’t want me to.
I like your list of things you think make a long-term partnership work. I was nodding my head as I read each one. I’ve definitely learned a lot since my first marriage.
This isn’t one of the questions you asked, but one thing I wish “Sweet Daddy” and I could have experienced before we got married was ALONE TIME. We were both single parents with full-time custody of our children when we met and fell in love. We never got to go out on dates. We got to know each other over the phone (3-4 hour conversations each night) and on the weekends with our kids present. But, I guess I really wouldn’t change anything about that time. It was so special. He’s my best friend.
And, thank you for admitting that you and Scott have argued. I can’t stand it when couples say they never argue.
Happy anniversary! This is a really beautiful post. I hope you and your family have a wonderful time in Aruba!
hahahaha, love LOVE the first part of your post – if I’m ever getting married it’s going to happen something like that, and aMEN to having lived a different life and not regretting, not wanting to go back, just…that was a different life and it was good, too. CONGRATULATIONS on the ten years – I think it is SO important to stop and listen and learn from your experience like you’ve obviously done! – the “list”… Wauv, you’ve done so many things together, I really think that is relationship “glue” as well. Oi, and congratulations on contributing to Marcus’ site too, that’s exciting!
and all the best, to you, to your relationship with Scott.
Relationship tips? Pay attention to the person you’re with. If you stop doing that, you might as well leave. And only fight the fights that matter, but DO fight the fights that matter – equally important! Hope you have the best time in the sun
Congratulations on 10 years! Wow Averie that is wonderful!
Jason and I have been married a little over 3 years and this is definitely my longest relationship. I never really found anyone a really truly connected to — and once I found that in Jason I hung on
Top relationship tips: go to pre marriage counseling and don’t be afraid of going back after you are married. Nothing is wrong with having a mediator during difficult times. And this goes without saying, but COMMUNICATE!
Have a wonderful trip Averie and enjoy every day! (and thanks for the link about Marcus — he is a big deal and that is so cool that you are a contributor on his site!)
Wow, hard to imagine you as a hard core party gal, life takes interesting paths! Happy anniversary! Cute post!
1. Yes, we’ve been married for just under two years, but together for over 13.
2. Stop trying to figure out what your perfect match is before you even meet someone and be ready to accept the challenges.
3. Having more fun together when were were young and had more time, we traveled a lot and took many weekend vacations in Florida.
We just celebrated 30 years of marriage and I couldn’t feel more blessed! I just turned 50 so I got married really young (the day after I turned 20!). Together we’ve lived in 6 countries and raised 4 children and traveled to over 100 countries. I can honestly say that being married to my best friend has been the joy of my life. My 22-year-old daughter often says, “Mom, you are so lucky! I want what you and Daddy have”. I have to remind her that it isn’t “luck”. We work at being our best selves for each other every day. The secret to a happy marriage is simple: strive to meet each other’s needs. If your needs are being met, you will feel like you are in a very happy marriage – and you are! Happy Anniversary!!!
Happy Anniversary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Congrats!!!
Beautiful post too!! Being married is a special feeling!! Knowing that someone chooses you, and that you choose them forever, so awesome!
Hope you are enjoying the sun with your hubby and the gorgeous Skylar!!
Congratulations!! What an accomplishment. This was a wonderful post.
Happy Anniversay! And wow Averie, thanks so much for posting this… I know you were just doing a recap of your past 10 years, but hearing more of your story meant so much to me, especially in the place I am right now!
The biggest thing for me is to know that there are other happy and functional “age-disparate” couples out there outside of my own relationship. I have to admit that sometimes it’s been really hard for me to deal with other people’s comments and opinions (especially from close friends and family). I met my husband when I was just about to turn 19, and we are 21 years apart, and it’s not something I mention often because of the reactions I get. From the moment we saw each other, we just knew. I moved in with him within a week of our first kiss, and were handfasted within 6 months and have been together ever since (that was 5 years ago). We’ve had a rough patch over the past year because of me but like you said, when you’re committed, you work through it with love. We’re still going strong, and I know that no matter what people may have said or will say, we were meant to be together and we work so well together. Long story short, thanks for having shared that
Have an awesome trip!
Chantal, I second your entire post! Wow, it is so nourishing to me to hear about “other happy and functional ‘age-disparate’ couples out there.” Age-ism can be a battle with so much prejudice around us, but to simply know there are others like us is the very best affirmation!
Averie,
I cannot express how much this post means to me on a very personal level. My boyfriend (also coincidentally named Scott) is also significantly older than I am and throughout our relationship, we’ve faced the very same judgments and opposition that it sounds like you have. We know we are going to spend the rest of our lives together, but even now after 4 years, we can’t help laughing when we think about how we’re proving (and will continue to prove) everyone else wrong, too. Happy Anniversary! I am so happy for you both! And thank you, thank you, thank you for sharing your story. You are an inspiration to me…
xo
Desi
Happy 10 years to you! I hope you have an amazing time on your vacation.
I am married–it will be 5 years this summer.
I agree with your tips for a great relationship. I think keeping the intimacy alive is also super important. At least that sure helps my husband and me!
Brian & I will be celebrating our 3 year anneversary this June, but I have known him for 1/2 of my life! (We first met when I was 15 & I’ll be 30 this year.) We were friends for YEARS and when I was 23 & he was 31, we fell in love and the rest is history. I feel so blessed to be married to my best friend
!! Your list of ‘better chance of survival’ is spot on Averie. I couldn’t agree with you more. We’ve got some vacation time planned at the end of the month and the plan is to have no plan. We’re going to pack for a nice dinners out, bike rides along the coast, hikes in Big Sur and then see where to road takes us with no hotels or activities planned/ lined up. I’M SO EXCITED 
Enjoy your much needed vacation together and happy anneversary to you and Scott!!
Happy anniversary!
Happy anniversary and enjoy your vacation!
Time moves fast, doesn’t it? I can barely imagine what will happen to me in the next 10 years, but I’m sure that when I get there and think back on everything and how the me now would react, it’d probably be the same way you would have.
Have a great time.
AWW! Happy Anniversay!! Lovely post.
Congrats and live it up and love it up!
I am on year 11! woohoo!
Aww that was a sweet post! Happy Anniversary!
I got married when I was 17
We had a really quick relationship, too! He proposed about a month after we began dating, and two months after that we got married. We celebrated 5 years of marriage in February of this year. 
I definitely didn’t expect to be married and have two kids by 23 but here I am, haha.
Wow! Congrats for those ten years Averie…you go girl.
)
I have been reading and loving your blog for quite a while now, and relish seeing your love for your daughter Skylar.
I myself, am a grandfather and lucky to have found my soulmate third wife ten years ago.
I am blessed.
Most of my recent attraction to your blog stems from the fact that after raising our two gorgeous grandchildren for the first six years of their lives, and giving all that we could give, our youngest boy and his new wife decided to just abruptly cut off from both the precious ones, because my wife and I are both smokers.
No discussion, no compromise, nothing…
Six months now without a word.
I would have easily changed my lifestyle any way I needed to, just to still had them both in my life.
So, finally I try to resign myself to the fact that I cannot be a part of their life anymore.
I just cannot imagine telling MY parents that, oh, by the way, you will never see your grandkids again.
BUT, Averie, your writings do bring immense joy to my life at this time, because it is so nice to witness how much you love your Skylar.
She reminds me of my Isabelle and Isiah.
Thanks for hearing me out and have a fabulous Aruba!!
Yay! Congrats on 10 years and Happy Anniversary! What a wonderful way to celebrate!! And I LOVE your list, all so very true.
The hubby and I have only been married 2 years so we’re still relatively new to all of this
But we were together for 4 years prior to getting hitched. We also have a 18 month old son (named Scott 
) so our lives have changed dramatically! Actually today is our first date in over a year!!
Also, quick question… is Scott also vegan/vegetarian? And if not, how do you cook meals at home? My hubs eats a ton of meat and I eat mainly vegan (although I’m not even vegetarian) and I find myself cooking separate meals often or just giving up and eating something I’d rather not. Just kind of struggling with preparing meals and wondered if you have any good advice!
Enjoy your trip and get some sleep (I read in a previous post you only sleep 4 hours! Crazy!!)!
Happy Anniversary to both of you! What great timing for your trip. I remember that old post about how to make a relationship work and love everything that you say. Relationships take work, and there are times when you’re joined at the hip and times when you’re ships in the night, but you still love each other and make it work–and the more diversity of ways of interaction you have, the more flexible and versatile the relationship.
Sounds like you have an awesome one.
Phil and I have been married 2 and a half years, together for three. We got some of those same comments you mentioned because he’s almost 30 yrs older than me. I worry a little about our different approaches to healthcare (he’s hurt his back and is living on aspirin and looking for something stronger) but all I can do is love him and trust him to do his best by his own lights.
I think letting go of the small stuff as much as possible and focusing on love and support is huge.
Love how you said he has no idea it’s your anniversary! Seems like it’s more of a guy thing not to know.
Have a great celebration.
love
Ela
This is so wonderful! Happy Anniversary, Averie.
Happy Anniversary and Congratulations!
The hubby and I didn’t have many relationship supporters either…we were too young (18 & 21), we hadn’t been together long enough to know if we were each other’s “ones” (married 17 after the first date), I was looking for a father for my daughter (she was 6mos old when we met) and he didn’t know any better, blah blah blah
We’ll be celebrating 12 years of marriage in October.
Have fun in Aruba!
i want to see wedding pictures!
Wow! Congratuations! 10 years is awesome!!!
I’m currently in the longest relationship of my life, which is going on 9 months. (I’m 24, give me a break!)
It’s amazing and I would definitely say that honesty, open communication and being best friends is what makes it continue to work, even through the struggles. When you know that your relationship is more important than anything else and you live by that rule, then it will last.
Congrats Averie! My hubby and I just celebrated our 10-year anniversary last month! In many ways, our marriages have been very similar. We traveled a lot and saw the world before adopting our 2-year-old son in 2009. Have a wonderful time in Aruba!!
Happy anniversary to you & Scott. It sure sounds like you have just about done everything and enjoyed every moment. Skylar is blessed to have parents like you.
Enjoy Aruba!
Happy Anniversary!!! I love that you wrote about you and your husband and your 17 year difference. My bf is 13 yrs older than me and ppl think I’m making a mistake by being with him. This post just gives me more hope than ever before. It is hard because sometimes I feel like we are in such different chapters of our lives but we get along so well that it just cliques
Happy anniversary! I’ve never been married, but I hope to find someone that I can share as many good experiences with as you and Scott have shared together
Happy Anniversary to you two! I hope you have a wonderful time with your family and that you guys enjoy each other’s company for a trillion more years!
I really love the list you made.
Happy Anniversary to you both! Have a great time in Aruba!
Happy Anniversary and have a fantastic vacation!
I know this is late but I’m just catching up on your recent posts–CONGRATS on such a milestone anniversary!!! My one year anniversary is coming up soon and I hope that in 9 years I can say all of these wonderful things that you are saying about your marriage! In this day and age, staying married for a decade is an amazing personal accomplishment, so I HEARTILY congratulate you on getting to where you are. I hope you have many more decades together!
Aww, Averie…congratulations on ten years together! HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU AND SCOTT!!
I met my hubby in high school and we got married 4 years later so we have been married (next month) for 16 years, together for over 20. He is the love of my life and we have beautiful children together and our relationship now is better than it ever has been.
I would say the best relationship advise I have gained is that we cannot change each other, nor should we try. Love each other for who he/she is and be willing to let go and let him/her just be. The best things come from that. The worst things come from trying to control another human being to fit some idea of who you think he/she should be.
Have a fabulous vacation in Aruba! Would LOVE to go there!! One day, perhaps!!
Congratulations on your 10th anniversary! My husband and I have you beat with the age difference. Graham is 18 years older than me. We have been married for 17 years. Yes, relationships take work, even when you have found your soul mate. People keep growing and changing, interests may vary, life circumstances change, but there is something very satisfying about sharing this with someone special.
Have fun in Aruba!
Happy Anniversary!!!!! The fact that you guys have accomplished so much is 10 years is such a blessing, and I love that you talk about how he’s your best friend! You deserve all the happiness in the world and many more lovely years together, my friend! xo
I’m a little late, but happy anniversary, Avery! Gosh, 10 years? I have NO IDEA where I’ll be 10 years from now, and I go through waves of panicking and being okay with that. You have a wonderful life, with a wonderful family. I’m so happy for you
PS I think we were literally commenting at the same time. Creeeeepy.
Happy Anniversary to you and your husband!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Enjoy Aruba!
Congratulations!!
You are living each moment.
Congrats on your anniversary! My husband Joe and I have been married 3 1/2 years and this is the 3rd marriage for both of us. He is 8 years my senior (he’s 50 and I’m 42) and people said he’s only with me as his “arm candy” because he’s going through mid life crisis. I don’t care what people think as I love him with all I have and he feels the same with me. Our kids (6 total) are at the age where we can just go on impromptu dates. We also take off on our Harley on the weekends we don’t have kids and we feel like kids ourselves. Life is tough but love is strong.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!
Hope you both had a lovely day!
Enjoy your holiday in Aruba! Lucky things….
Congratulations! A decade of life together is something big to celebrate. I met my hubby also 10 years ago and can’t be happier of finding him!
You two together have done so many incredible things together, so happy for you!
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